badideas 2016

Bad ideas, brain farts, no filter, 2016
  • Improving your impulse control just half the time is an improvement.
  • It's so hot out there I just saw a bird flying around wearing oven mitts.
  • There it is, a gaggle.
  • Progress = ( growth + innovation ) Risk Taking / ( learning + failure ) Cost
  • Advertising = Colored bits of paper + Clickbait
  • Just as you come up with something new to get away with, you find out that someone is already getting away with it.
  • As a general rule for engaging B2B clients, if you don't buy any of their stuff, then pass.
  • I  wish I had a piece of bread, with some tomato and some fat on it.
  • One day, The Homeless will live in Space.
  • Is it a life and death issue? Depends on who shows up.
  • Our spam agency is powered by trolls.
  • Q v1.0 How do I generate leads?
    Q v1.1 How do I find better clients?
    Q v2.0 How do better clients find me?
    What do you make that's awesome?!
  • On framing and the right question / So if you wanted access to make your favorite thing, what do you need and what are you making?
  • Your target audience are people and their filter bubble.
  • How can you tell if someone is mocking you? When you ask them, Are you mocking me, and they respond with, Are you mocking me?
  • Engage and embrace complexity and information density.
  • If you do something half-ass, then do it in moderation.
  • Hipster vs Minimalist
  • iphone vs android
    Bacon-loving Hording Hipster vs Vegan Cloud-based Minimalist
    Fake Old-Timey vs Paleo Ultra-Modern 
  • So does this represent the peak of your imagination or the peak of your ability?
  • I like to keep a Rolex handy because it's worth money, but I also keep money handy.
  • Look for universal lifestyle solutions, at Ikea.
  • Did you suffer for your art? If not, then I'm not interested.
  • Google Daydream is coming fall 2016?
  • He may be strange, but he is no stranger to strangeness.
  • Creative? More like font picker.
  • One o'clock? More like Wine o'clock! Chardonnay? More like Chardo-yay!
  • I never made it to the flophouse.
  • Does this look real-ish?
  • You want to avoid doom for as long as you can, and hope that nothing will come of it.
  • Oh baby, your farts are like a blooming cabbage.
  • The Easter Crank is for Easter, like the Xmas Crank is for Xmas. 
  • I have a Like botnet with fake pinterest accounts. Do you have your hashtag? 
  • Your porn is so old it only comes in Latin -- I'm sure I had heard that joke before.
  • Merch it?
  • You have a dilemma with aligning your aspirations, abilities, and activities.
  • Pretend to be humble, and don't make eye contact. Pretend to be noble, give innumerable credit to everyone.
  • No I will not end you. But I will make it impossible for your to exist.
  • Try to say diminutive a few times, without adding or dropping syllables.
  • Corn in a cup breaks the retail corn on a cob price stranglehold.
  • In E=M C2, C is celeritas, Latin for speed. The other idea is that C for a convenient constant, but that's not informing.
  • Hey buddy. I'm selling if you're buying. Nothing weird.
  • You have to fight people at work, just to do your job.
  • Progress: getting old and fat.
  • Nobody likes a grump. To boost happiness replace a micro rage with story sharing.
  • The Arts is to do with the makings of useless things, temporary showings, and generally expensive waste. Art causes some delight to the correct guests. Its subject material passes between vulgar necessities and technocratic esotericism, yet only just passing off as culturally significant on some historical or contemporaneous blur. A successful artist would build a reputation by making large canvases or large space-occupying things, passing off as intending to complement appropriate real estate spaces, all the while targeting the aesthetics of specific egos with means to cause impressive similar acquisitions. The key is to conjure a sense of connection between the person standing there at it all and the associated net of causality that makes it all only just possible, albeit coming together at great human expense, only temporarily, and hence most fortunate for the one. 
  • A high speed unisex toilet with pee holes and poo holes, separated by modesty partitions, would determine appropriate fashion.
  • On design, you want to build your machine, turn the crank, and something good comes out. You don't want to have to craft every single uniquely defective piece.
  • On basic websites: branding, framework, content
  • On Neural Nets, first start with a responsive substrate. The net gets trained via exposure to data, internal and external. It builds up by adding new nodes and by adjusting the connection weights of existing nodes. All nodes are activated concurrently, with activity influenced by connection weight. The net is expressed in a processing substrate that support localized inter node barriers and bridging connection, with processing based on metabolic activity, and recording as building up of structures caused by favorable or corresponding outcomes.
  • On social media jobs, after a brief moment of discovery and excitement, people resist corporate spam. You can only undo that with making artful content, or give-aways.
  • On FMCG, something needs to be sold to the masses, there is no shortage of staples, so it needs to be something that speaks to hearts and minds of many people. So there is the old problem to solve, what are we making and who are we making it for?
  • On ideation, if you put all your badideas into lists by category, it might reveal an a periodic table of topics -- like lists, just better for your head.
  • On graphic design, a 2D bitmap trace to path to blender extrusion to overlaying photos -- applies to almost zero client work?
  • On photographic lighting setups and kits vs DIY. Peter Hurley's constant LED light kit with 3 units costs $5500 -- you can get 10x 2FHD 55cm TVs for that amount of money, or fewer units plus stands and adjustable hardware. With large TV panels you can design any color and shape lighting you want. There is good value, terrible value, and creative opportunity.
  • On investment junk news, dis-aggregate asset classes, valuations, movement trends and causality. The News offers aggregated data summaries that would never be actionable by professional investors, while the average punter only sees a few data points and attempts to bridge a connection across the vast void in between, hoping to beat the market or not be punished by it for a near complete lack of insight. Big data and expert analysis on this topic is still at a stage of pseudo-science.
  • On advertising. There is only Making and Connecting. Connecting things to eyeballs via blurbs and blurs.
  • video-script: dystopian cyberpunk hipsters standing around concrete scapes, light, re-purposed fashion and incidental tech, fast to slow, selling something tech
  • video-script: present box, handover, first person to second person experience, person puts it on head becoming first person, comments, suspension of disbelief, then crazy experience stuff happens
  • video-script: video, traditional iconography in paleo contexts, transition to contemporary iconography in amazing contemporary contexts, transition to stylized imagery with non deleniated iconography and context 
  • On lifehack: Ikea FRAKTA hack trolley bag for every day backpack. Tried it. Too big. Did not find a non destructive, adaptive way to fold it smaller at will. Should return to this problem, maybe with a bent bar to fold over.
  • On super-organism: We are one organism that lives forever, with increasing inter-node activity, node numbers, and node layers via networked devices.
  • On password security, Use a long RSA generated key string, in fragments or chopped up and remixed as needed, for maximum allowable length passwords, with 2step authentication. This has been working well.
  • On pricing for services: When people are charged a significant discounted rate, they are not fully committed to the project, and time gets wasted. You can apply a discount later, and only if you need to, but firstly establish the total cost of ownership to all  parties. Default to preferring to work on your own project before client work; a client needs to offer a premium to take you away from your work. Produce a quote outlining the process, with pricing based on estimated hours and hourly rate.
  • On debt industry, via John Oliver on creditor contracts being sold for pay opportunities, is also an equal opportunity for debtor side contracts being transferred for pay opportunities. As a creditor can transfer the contract, so could the debtor, one assumes. An operator like Ivan Smirnov would be happy to accept debt contracts at $500 a piece from 1000 debtors to deal with admin from speculative collection agents. Marketing to the sub-prime as a "solution provider" for a means tested fee might be wildly successful. All that is required is a judicial test in each jurisdiction. A transfer for a consideration fee generally holds legal weight. With a rapid agency uptake, should create sufficient value and enable very high value political donations, enabling further short term legislative backing. Operational capacity for fast uptake, faster to what any opposition can respond to is the key.
  • On religion, via Alister Mcgrath. Is it a psychological condition, passed on from adult to child, and attractive as a  local maximum. Getting past this local maximum attractor is difficult for the following reasons at least: learning is hard and slow work, having your existential ideas attacked is confronting especially outside of work and academia; no immediate payoff; immediate personal consequences; it is intuitive to hold on to the preexisting state rather than let go. Religion affected populations co-exist with under education in generally underdeveloped areas. Religion and science satisfy the yearning for meaning; science however is much harder to develop, whereas religion can be conjured and conveyed by ambitious individuals. And then there are populations trapped in oppressive circumstances who must submit to religion.
  • On brand names: name generator uses random common nouns - letters + random other letter ; title generator: any idea can be addressed by two word adjective noun (not always) factors, like (Focal Synergistic...)x(Buzz  Strategy...). This is about THOUGHT LEADERSHIP, about HOLISTIC SYNERGY, about MANIFESTING DISAGGREGATIONISM, about SIGNAL PURITY.
  • On brand design, inspiring affinity for: nostalgia old timy, identity aspiration, cool hunting, place experience, activity experience, staple-like familiarity seeding repeat purchase; identify who responds to what, correct market potential, and use resources to occupy that space; that is why things look the way they do.
  • On content, strap a cam to things (car, bike, drone, dog, cat) and sell the content to boring corporates for their social. 
  • Oh helping people, via watching William Green. Helping is not a waste. When you help people to do what you approve of, they go on and continue to stack the deck in your favor.
  • On the value of storytelling; noted via Carmine Gallo on storytelling; moon shots, rags to riches, overcoming adversity; compelling story with an emotional trigger makes us more trusting, understanding and open to ideas; like TED presentations; short narratives connect to people; there is power in identity; transformative movie story structure has a setup, a villain/problem/conflict/drama, and a resolution; practice presentation many times; introduce characters; capture the organisational stories; leadership is trending to transparency and authenticity; reduce assumption of rationality and increase assumption of the emotional; hook them with the same problem; people remember the story more so than the storyteller.
  • On electric cars, while watching Tesla 3 launch; a universal electric upgrade or option kit for all average 2WD cars cars would do the job of converting all cars to electric. The kit would include 2 wheel assemblies, a battery pack and either an assistive controller for millage improvement or comprehensive controller for full plug-in electric conversion. Adapted wheels would be permanently stopped, with breaking function implemented in the wheel. This would suit small front wheel drive cars best.
  • A note on dyson spheres via Paul Horowitz talk, on the universal time scale we are between primitive civilizations advanced civilizations. Primitive stars systems emit light, as our sun does. Star systems with advanced civilizations would harvest all of their star energy, via Dyson spheres. Hence Dark matter, which has mass but emits no visible energy, are Dyson spheres with advanced civilizations.
  • On bureaucracy comments, for large institutions and especially the public sector, it is held as best practice that every newly created job and every existing job that comes up for renewal must be advertised. However, there are multiple idiosyncrasies associated with this driver that follow. Firstly the organizational behaviour and policy can be attributed to: historical reasons with conservative rate of change, textbook labor pool flexibility, the appearance of transparency as required, the appearance of equal employment opportunity as required, risk management, contract negotiation power, a box ticking culture, scope creep, and incentive constructs, to name a few general ones. It is a conjecture that most such jobs are earmarked for internal use. This is based on the following before mentioning the common alternative: the word heavy job ads unchecked by sales HR; page heavy position descriptions; a selection criteria reflecting a committee of stakeholders all for good measure; and a highly involved and drawn out hiring process; an abstract set of outcome expectations removed from any market based, profit and loss based, or sunset clause mission based accountability. Comparable alternative hiring practices from outside of such bureaucracies show: market friendly ads; urgent placement; relying on the talent's visible abilities; and bottom line impact. It is a further conjecture that if all of industry behaved in the way that bureaucracies do, the economy would grind to a halt. Because of the large pool of bureaucratic jobs, via the large size of the public sector, the total macroeconomic job market ends up looking distorted, indicating more movement than how it plays out. The job listings data set, as used by economists and forecasters, needs to have corrections applied to undo industry specific idiosyncrasies and consequential distortions. To the contrary, high simplistic job listings counts get reported as a favorable economic indicator, although this is a more useful talking point for political pundits over actual big business investment decisions. 
  • On the universe, in the big bang model, the inflation part may contain the main part of all of causality and hence relevant existence, with the largest sum of interactions. Everything thereafter is by comparison a low energy, nearly inanimate ghostly junk, waiting for something else to slowly happen.
  • On lifehack: Integrate what you are consuming into your practice immediately, else add to your todo list for later, else no learning at all happens.
  • On lifehack: prospect / work / develop
  • On ebooks: Use HD aspect ratio for pdf ebook, because ebook are viewed on phones, laptops, and TVs most of which are HD. If printing, resize to fit, with a top bottom margin, letterboxed.
  • On economic incentives, assets growth, and recruitment testing; We can view individuals purely as a profit and loss entities (like company profit centers), acting in small or large leveraged aggregates. Individual wage earners have a few days to survive, until their cash runs out; individual salary earners have a few months to survive, until their accrued earnings are depleted, home related assets sold off, and loans can no longer be serviced; and the rich can survive forever via managed asset portfolios, and appropriate spending rates. Entrepreneurs however span the range, out of necessity and nature. Beyond essential sleep, idle time is a cost to an individual earner; it should be avoided like all non work related expenses that have a negative effect on asset accumulation. In this scheme it follows that non rich non earners can be classified as dysfunctional, regardless of localized wealth redistribution policy; also individuals who fail to produce a sufficiently fast growing asset pool (bad gamblers, sub prime mortgage holders, substance users, big discretionary spenders). These tests can be applied as a hiring diagnostic toolkit. Is the prospect dysfunctional? Has a short survival extent? Is entrepreneurial? If the prospect is to be trusted with autonomy then what would be the likely outcomes? However, the meaning of entrepreneurial is vague.
  • On testing art: could this have been made 5 years ago? 10, 20, 50? If yes then the artist did not innovate in their field.
  • On booming cities and participation in booming areas (like Silicon Valley); It means that everyone in that area works hard and forfeits all of their work outcomes to incumbent rent seekers and taxation. The only current benefit is temporary survival and some fun. The only future benefit is a build up of cache for future deployments, if one is lucky enough.
  • On category design, have lots and lots of consumer sector choice, via branded and varied products that maximize occupancy of visual space, time and total engagement, all owned by the same company maximizing its sector profit, regardless of duplication or inconsistency.
  • TVC script. Slow motion nature shot. Vague aspiration word combos. Face closeups. Slow large scale activity. Sentence words. Show the box.
  • Just pick a company with an interesting chemical portfolio, and push it via the channels.
  • On unfinished ideas, things that had never been, nor really belong anywhere, and certainly not more so than here within this compendium -- not on imaginary realities (which cause real problems), false memories (which are common), expert or lazy exchanges (which produce some level of noise), and disputes (involving assets) -- if it don't measure than it don't matter.
On management consulting and org analysis:
  • ecosystem: identify repeating features across scale/locations/disciplines/activities, can be sliced with analysis tools (to identify for replication if good, correction if bad, normalization for compatibility, trend spotting, or routine diagnostics)
  • people: are the engines that drive all activity
  • all activities: observable, use technology, operations activities/functions (flows), other activities (idiosyncratic, one time project activities, formalized or otherwise), internal external, inputs (b2b, etc), outputs (sector), profits (redirected)
  • methods: scripts with steps, updating record systems, acts of communication (calling, meetings) for all activity
  • functions (formalized activities): goal seeking, profit seeking, designed, resourced, grouped for efficiency (people, activities, technology)
  • flow functions: looped functions
  • proprietary technology: devices, internal big data, methods, functions, flow functions, idiosyncratic proprietary arrangements
Common Branding Motifs:
  • lines (tape) 
  • sparsity (letters, cnc cut sticker) 
  • rustic appropriation orthodox hipster emblems (crosses w letters, coat of arms on wood, guild emblems, stitching, tools of trade, professional shorthand icons)
  • adobe cs (photoshop layer effects, illustrator tricks / curves / gradients)
  • recognizable lifestyle anachronisms (filofax, moleskin, paper, pencil n ruler, chalkboard, calculator, office tools, dingbats, clip art) 
  • achievement and aspirational stock photos (upward graphs, handshakes, sport movements, medals, trophies, awards) 
  • tech brand framework (common UI iconography) 
  • trending (graphic designer color pallets, infinite 4 o'clock shadow, device illustration, logos) 
Five star rating places I go to all the time
  • Aldi
  • Ikea
  • HandM
  • Kmart
  • MCA
  • White Rabbit Gallery
  • Artificer Specialty Coffee Bar
  • Indian Home Diner
  • Chairman Mao Chinese Restaurant
  • The Dolphin Hotel
  • Melbourne (all of it)
  • MONA (TAS)
Catch Phrases
  • Petunia
  • Pft
  • You get what you get
  • Pizza boy, I has you the pizza, hope you like it
  • I say, madam...
  • Are you sure? I'm not so sure.
  • It is the year of ear of corn
  • Foot pelts
  • last words matter
  • batch daily activities into single uninterrupted tasks
  • practice storytelling
  • show something messy and unexpected